Monday, June 29, 2009

Distance Breaks Hearts

Isn’t it sad how humans can’t fly?

Think about it, we’d be so beautiful with wings. They would be extremely convenient too.

So the time he said “I wish you were here.” I would have said “I’m on my way.”

Then I would run, jump, spread my wings, and fly….

One way, non-stop to where he is…

Intertwine my fingers with his, tell him I’d be there as long as he wanted me to stay….

Kiss him, lightly, then get changed and go see a movie…

If I had wings, he’d never have to see a movie alone…..

Even if it was a movie I couldn’t stand, I wouldn’t mind, I’d just watch him instead….

Count beer bottles till we fell asleep… or maybe not…

Let him play with my hair…

Kisses, kisses, more kisses…

No broken hearts, no sad faces…

Not even when I was flying back home, because he’d know all he had to do was pick up the phone…

“I wish you were here.”

I wish I were there.

Copyright ©2009 Chinwe Arinze

Sunday, June 28, 2009

The Shame Game

So my older sisters and I were the weirdest kids when we were younger.

Like most young siblings, we were virtually inseparable. We thought we were spies {the first letter of our names forming the alias C.N.N}, ballerinas, singers, song writers, engineers, dancers, and everything else our imaginations could conjure up.

Years later C.N.N has disbanded. N1 is married, N2 is working, and C is in college… but every once in a while, we come across something that reminds us why some children’s minds should never be left unsupervised.

I miss being a kid.

The Shame Game

Big shame, small shame,

Red shame, blue shame,

Skinny shame, fat shame,

Fat shame, slim shame,

Glad shame, grim shame,

Rich shame, poor shame,

Clean shame, dirty shame,

Sane shame, mad shame,

Good shame, bad shame

Shame with two arms shame with four,

Shame can be little and sometimes more,

Black shame, white shame

Dull shame, bright shame

Shame that's bad and shame that’s sad,

And sometimes makes your neighbors glad,

So all in all it’s plain to see,

That shame just isn’t meant for me,

So leave me shame, and let me be!

My life is not a place for thee!

Copyright ©2009 Chinwe Arinze

Friday, June 26, 2009

Opportunity Cost

Something moved past the house at high speed. I stirred and went back to sleep.

Then another one *whoosh*.

And another.

As they approached their noise grew increasingly loud, and for the millisecond they flew by my window I felt like my house would crumble like it was made from a deck of cards.

The ground shook.

My eyes shot open.

“No,” I whispered silently, “God no!”

I knew what they were, and I knew why they were here. Low altitude fighter jets were only deployed for one reason. My world was over.

“I’ll do anything,” I cried silently from my bed, willing myself to move but unable to, “I’ll give him up, I’ll stop.” I didn’t think twice about the words that I prayed silently, I knew the reason I was still here.

If it was true, what I thought was happening, then shutting my eyes and never opening them again would be better than what I would have to face. I was trapped in my body, in my own bed, forced to realize the heartache that was coming even before it came. My family would be gone, my earth would be rocked, my reasons for living taken away in seconds.

News channels all showed the same thing, but I wasn’t sure how I was watching. It was almost telepathic, however my sudden possession of supernatural powers didn’t surprise me in the least. Every channel carried the same headline: DISASTER. On a massive scale.

God had left the world. He had left us humans to our own devices. He had gotten sick of watching our sin, and turned away from our shame. Lies, lust, loathing of our fellow humans, lack of compassion, loss of morality. He’d taken his children away, and the rest of us that remained, would live in a world without Him, which equaled only one thing. DISASTER.

My heart rate doubled at the thought, I felt it beat a tune that the world would dance to for a long time to come.

Fires, turmoil, confusion, tears. Husbandless wives, motherless children, a half empty world.

I prayed fiercely but silently, “God I can change, I can stop, I can give him up. Don't let this be real," I shuddered before the rest of the sentence escaped my lips, "don't leave me behind."

Silence. The commotion had stopped as suddenly as it started.

All of a sudden the world was at peace again.

I could hear silent rhythmic breathing in the bed next to mine. I sat up and called her name, “Zoe?” She stirred. My sister was still here.

I picked up my cell phone, and clicked the green call button to light up the screen. 3am.

It was over. I’d had a nightmare while fully conscious. A vision?

I silently thanked God for not giving up on me, and that my family was still here.

Then my thoughts flew to him, in an instant I had traded him without hesitation to get my life back. Wasn’t he part of my life? One of my constant sources of happiness for the little time I’d known him. He meant a lot to me.

After regaining total control of my mind and emotion, only one question came to mind.

How could I give him up?

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

No one will notice

I’ve watched the men who lead, governed by greed,

Abandon their pledge, to be ‘faithful, loyal and honest’,

They use thirty percent and stuff the rest in their pockets,

Thinking no one will notice.

I’ve seen officials slip envelopes under the carpets,

Waiting for their backs to be scratched, and their palms to be greased,

Asking for their selfish appetites to be appeased,

Before you are pleased,

Thinking no one will notice.

Those men in uniform,

Who serve and protect by daylight,

But by cover of the night they fight to possess the product of your soil,

The fruit of your toil,

Thinking no one will notice.

How I hate that I am married to that soil,

For better or for worse,

Through diplomacy or by force,

Through the color of my skin,

So to escape the skin that I’m in I get on a tin bird and fly away,

I run like a wife from a violent husband,

Knowing she will never be at home in another man’s land,

But who cannot sustain more abuse from the same man’s hand,

As each slap drives the dreams and hopes from her,

As he stands and watches her suffer,

Thinking no one will notice.

But like a veteran plagued with bad dreams,

I still hear the voices of the innocent in my sleep,

I hear them calling from the deep parts of broken hearts,

I hear them wail about how truth and justice fail,

And the wicked prevail,

Crying out from an inescapable jail,

Thinking no one will notice.

Copyright ©2009 Chinwe Arinze

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Every Artists Dream!

So I found the crack of artistry... this tool gets me high just watching the tutorials....

Whether you're a painter, fashion designer, or illustrator, you'll agree that the Wacom 12wx is wicked! It makes a pencil/brush and paper look like ish from the flintstones. It's definitely number 2 on my wishlist, after the Nikon D90.

Speaking of camera's, I manned my cousin's D40 for my famz grad party last weekend, got some mad shots. Its only got 6.1 megapixels, as opposed to the D90 which has 12.3, however I finally figured out how I'd look with that third eye ;)

Wednesday, June 3, 2009

If I had a third eye...

.... it would be a camera lens. I love Photography. 
Now I'm still very amateur, but I believe that anyone can take a good picture, it just requires having a good eye. I've got this crazy art obsession, had it since I was born probably. I sold out however, and joined the business community when I got to college. But every so often I take an arts class, just so I don't lose my passion for all things artistic.

I was going through the picture albums on my laptop, and I found a few shots I took two summers ago. Out of boredom I borrowed my dads camera and took shots of anything I found interesting. Some of the shots came out better than I anticipated. Scratch that. Some of the shots were amazing :) . These are a few of my favs:

I love colorless pictures, for some reason they seem deeper. Plus it's a good device to prevent plagerism, my pictures can't be stolen because I have the original shots in color. I've seen some amazing color shots though. I can't wait to get my new camera!